Neglect of self caused by living by other people’s design

Do you feel like you have lost touch with your true self? That you no longer know who you are? Who the essence of you really is?

You’ve heard it before, so you know you are not your job title or defined by your role in the family though you honestly don’t know who you are anymore. You have lost touch with what makes you truly happy. You question if this is it? Is this as good as life is going to get? You have a nagging longing for more out of life. You may be caught in the common trap of thinking my life will be better “if only I could lose 5 kilos, travel to some far flung destination or buy a new car”. Then I will find that missing piece of the jigsaw puzzle that is my life and finally feel content.

Maybe you will feel better if you achieve these things. Characteristically though, the feeling will not last. The weight piles back on, the holiday comes to an end and a newer, flashier car will catch your eye! Hey – it’s not all bad – you’ve got a couple of dollars in the bank, you have family and friends – all in all there is nothing too drastic to complain about. You minimise how you feel, believing that you don’t have a right to feel that way. You downplay your complaints filing them away as “first world problems” and feel guilty for complaining. So there is no catastrophe, the sky is not falling in however you have a sense that you want more from your life. But you don’t know what it is. Perhaps you feel off or a little unwell and you have been seeking medical help to find out what is wrong yet nothing shows up in the tests. You feel worn down as a result of keeping up with the pace of life and feel slightly apathetic. You, like many others, may be approaching your life fuelled by a sense of lack or with a poverty mentality, so that you will never feel like you have enough of whatever it is you think is lacking in your life. You have made some changes over the years although you recognise that complacency has set in. Maybe you don’t know who you are or what you want out of life? You’ve lost touch of that carefree version of yourself. There are bills to pay, a mortgage, a difficult boss, demanding social life and this is what you got to do, isn’t it? Does this ring any bells?

 

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